I think this domain was renewed by accident, but it’s still here, and thus it’s time for my sesquiennial blog post. I managed to pay off all my student loans in December, and I’m still debt free with a solid emergency fund. I also started a 401k a while back and have been dumping 10% of my income in there. And between moving into a place that’s a much better fit for us (a yard! a living room that’s not geometrically impossible! a gas stove! neighborhood children with reasonable bedtimes! WINDOWS!) and recently rediscovering my cooking mojo (I think I never really got used to cooking on an electric after Ecuador) it has been a decent year so far.
I also managed to spend something like 10% of this year’s annual gross earnings on my dog, who is 100% worth it. We had a brush with IVDD in January which could have resulted in permanent paralysis of his hind limbs had he not gotten emergency spinal surgery (did you know they have doggie neurosurgeons? and doggie physical therapists?) Several months later, in May, the little dude had a nerve sheath tumor removed from one of his good legs. The vet said the margins look clean and that she’s cautiously optimistic. He’s healed up now and back to running around happily, although a little wobbly in the rear. The vet also noted with amusement that he seems to have no clue whatsoever that there is anything wrong with him.

Happy dog in the park
Now that life is somewhat more under control, clearly the next priority is preparing for the zombie apocalypse, as recommended by the CDC. Here are some of the things I’m doing to get ready.

Growing food
There is a time in every man’s education when he arrives at the conviction that envy is ignorance; that imitation is suicide; that he must take himself for better, for worse, as his portion; that though the wide universe is full of good, no kernel of nourishing corn can come to him but through his toil bestowed on that plot of ground which is given to him to till.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson, Self-Reliance (this whole essay is really awesome)
I know of nothing that makes one feel more complacent…than to have vegetables from his own garden… It’s a kind of declaration of independence.
- Charles Dudley Warner, My Summer in a Garden
This wasn’t the best year to become a farmer. Spring used to be my favorite season, but the spring of 2011 has been one of the crappiest in Oregon’s history (the calendar says it is summer now, but thus-far summer is largely a lie.) All of the crops here are currently 2-3 weeks behind schedule. Despite the weather and the fact that I have minimal gardening experience, I am growing ALL THE THINGS (though my basil looks super emo.)
If zombies become our most prolific import (and presumably export), there will likely be no more fruit from Chile or tomatoes from Mexico. That’s easily a disaster in itself; fully two-thirds of the fruits and vegetables consumed in the United States are imported from other countries. Even if our internal supply chains were to remain intact, continuing to rely on domestically grown produce from the supermarket is probably not the best solution. Many crops grown in the United States (e.g. tomatoes) are associated with some really questionable practices (not to mention that if you’ve ever actually eaten a garden tomato you will likely be instantly and irrevocably converted to Tomato Snobbery.)
Growing some of my own food seemed like a workable solution. In addition to helping weekly on a local CSA farm, I have a 20′x20′ community garden plot to myself this year. Last year I was paralyzed by perfectionism and indecision so I didn’t start planting til mid-July. This year I have been slowly working out that consistency is much more useful than perfection (in several areas of my life), and thus I started preparing the plot in early February. I divided the plot into two 8′x18′ beds and single dug the whole thing by hand, mixing in a few wheelbarrows worth of compost for good measure.

The "early" half of the plot. From this.. (2/7)

To this.. (2/22)

To this! (6/27)
I’m growing pansies, carrots, two different heirloom lettuce blends, onions, garlic, celery, potatoes (in bags and in the ground), snap peas, shell peas, leeks, strawberries, rosemary, oregano, mammoth leaf and Thai basil, parsley, four different kinds of peppers (two hot and two sweet), two different varieties of beans (yin yang and cannellini), edamame, and three different kinds of heirloom tomatoes. Just about everything was started from seed, except for the pansies, onions and celery. I had a row of prolific spinach behind the lettuce, but it bolted and is now blanched and in the freezer, waiting to be turned into a Palak Paneer. I am still in awe at the concept of growing edible FOOD from DIRT.
So far the harvest has largely consisted of an inordinate amount of snap peas, but the little strawberry patch has also managed to produce quite a few berries. Along with the peas (which love cool weather), the lettuces have been quite prolific. I also managed to dig up a bowlful of new potatoes underneath one of the flowering plants, which went into a tasty soup. Shell peas are following behind the snap peas and should be ready soon. The onions are bulbing very nicely (they went in really early; I think March.) And today I noticed the very first two little green tomatoes setting on my tomato plants. There is hope for this season yet.

Les pois et les fraises. Ils ont un terroir!

Lettuce and more snap peas

Bulbing onion
Beans are mostly up, and the peppers and tomatoes are hanging in there waiting for the weather to get nice.

The "late" half of the plot, with beans, tomatoes, peppers, etc.
Lifting heavy things
Work it harder, make it better
Do it faster, makes us stronger
Zombieland suggested that Rule #1 is cardio, but I figure it’s equally important to be able to move obstacles out of the way of your sturdy vehicle so you can get the heck out of dodge.
I am steadily working on being able to do pull-ups, because even most fitness models cannot perform them without help. Also, maybe we will luck out and the zombies won’t be smart enough to climb trees.
Preserving food
I dug my cellar in the side of a hill sloping to the south…I took particular pleasure in this breaking of ground, for in almost all latitudes men dig into the earth for an equable temperature. Under the most splendid house in the city is still to be found the cellar where they store their roots as of old, and long after the superstructure had disappeared posterity remark its dent in the earth.”
- Henry David Thoreau, Walden
It’s not a whole lot of use growing food if you can’t take it with you when you’re fleeing the zombies. Or at least make it last through the winter, assuming your home has been secured against the onslaught of undead.
To this end, I obtained a combination thermometer/hygrometer ($12 on Amazon) to determine the best place in my rented house/garage/yard to McGyver a root cellar setup. Vegetables are fussy about the temperature and humidity in which they are stored, and some are more fussy than others. Clearly summer isn’t the best time to find cool and moist spots (aside from poking your head in the freezer), but the difference between ambient temperature and sampled temperature should grant a general idea of which areas are best insulated.

Thermometer/hygrometer with max/min values for the past 24 hours. For science!
In addition to exploring root cellaring, I have grand plans (and recipes) to can a bunch of convenience food (soups, stews, spaghetti sauce with meat and without, beans, applesauce) for this fall and winter. I’ve blanched and frozen a lot of food in the past few years, but I like the idea of trying the canning route because it turns out that you’re more likely to actually eat the homemade food if it doesn’t take three days to defrost. Since fruit and vegetables are cheapest in season, I expect eating more homemade food will have an impact on my grocery bill, but pure food snobbery seems to be an increasingly motivating factor. Locally grown comestibles like tomatoes, potatoes, and grass fed beef (though sadly my HOA prohibits livestock; I checked) are just appreciably better.
For a gentle introduction to canning, I started off with jam. Fruit is generally acidic enough that it can be processed in a big pot of boiling water, without the “OMG I need adult supervision” intimidation of canning things under pressure.
During the zombie apocalypse, sugar may become scarce. Thus I suggest using a low sugar pectin. I tried using the low sugar version of Surejell last year for some freezer jam, and was not terribly impressed (plus “low sugar” Surejell means 4 cups of sugar instead of 6 cups. My teeth are aching just from reading the instructions on the box.) This year I’ve switched to Pomona, which relies on monocalcium phosphate to set up, rather than ungodly amounts of sugar. My adult supervision friend Tammy and I were able to use just 1.5 cups of sugar for 8 cups of Hood strawberries.

A flat of Hood strawberries from Unger Farms

Strawberry jam or brrrraaaains?
Quilting
A lot of human hobbies, from knitting sweaters to building model airplanes, are probably rooted in the same human desire to control an entire process of manufacture. Karl Marx called it the antidote to alienation.
- Barbara Kingsolver, Animal, Vegetable, Miracle
How are you supposed to stay warm during the zombie apocalypse with only a 22-pound dog for company? Besides hand-knit socks, the answer is clearly blankets. Lots and lots of blankets. Scraps of fabric may be the only materials you have to use after the zombie invasion, so it’s best to learn how to work with them now.

Sewing room, complete with decorative dog
It’s important to have a dedicated space for sewing. Even if you don’t have any roommates and thus won’t bother anyone by leaving your sewing stuff out, not only will you eventually want to eat/game/hull strawberries at the dining room table, it’s also not ergonomically correct for either sewing (which requires a low surface) or cutting fabric (which requires a surface high enough to stand at.) Your back will thank you for taking it into consideration.

Blocks from my first quilt arranged in the traditional "barn raising" pattern.
At first, quilting involved rather a lot of swearing, but now I find it kind of peaceful and relaxing. Quilting is extremely precise in exactly the way that people generally aren’t. And since I generally have the habit of making a lot of things for other people, it’s nice to make something just for me.